bye bye, fruit fly

This seems to be a reoccurring theme in my life. How many ways can you say goodbye and how can you get out of saying goodbye? I'm a fan of slinking out of sight while no one is looking, but some of my better adjusted colleagues are not about to let that happen. With only 24 days left in this country I've pretty much packed and therefore my personal life is about closed up, now to close my school life. That one is going to be harder since my school life is bigger than my personal life here. I've already been feeling the desire to hold up in my apartment after school and hide from any activities. I'm supposed to be somewhere right now, actually, but I've let my passive aggressive self fix the situation so that I couldn't make it. I've never met a more stingy group of car owners in my life. You'd think people that had a car would offer you a ride, but never. It's bizarre really. In fact, one of my coworkers texted me while she was driving to see if I was going to the dinner and I said, no, because I didn't have a ride (passive aggressive, I know), but she said, ok, see you tomorrow. Really? In a way I was testing the situation. I am a big girl, I could have asked for a ride, but I wanted to see if she would offer. I am not up for socializing anyway, I'm in my "goodbye" funk, but she didn't even offer. So much for my fake friends.

Another colleague, who I'd like to add I have never hung out with outside of school, wants to have a going away party at his house for me. WHAT? Hello, we're not real friends, I don't know you. We've only ever talked at school, he's cool, I like him, but for real, now that I'm leaving you want to have a party? Um, no, that seems unreasonable to me. In a discussion with another coworker, she mentioned that you don't realize what you have until it's gone and yes, that may be true, but emotionally I'm already gone. I am still going to school every day, still going through the motions, but my mind and energy has moved on.

Peace out, brown trout.