"I'm giving up for Lent"
I opened my FB this afternoon and saw this post from a friend in Colorado. Genius.
A while back I decided to give up suffering for Lent. You know how Catholics are into guilt and suffering, the we must feel pain to be connected to God thing.
I just don't agree. I'm not sure why millions of people do, actually. It feels awful.
My new relationship with this universal energy is all about being positive, kind, generous, grateful, forgiving, all the opposite things I was raised with in church. I remember being a little kid, like 6 or 7 and thinking to myself as the preist preaches, how can I be this bad? I'm just a little kid. Could I possibly just be a sinner, how come I am so bad? I wish someone had told me about giving up for lent back then. This was also around the time that I was being manipulated and victimized and I distinctly remember asking God for help. Please make this stop, please help me. It wasn't until I was 12 that we moved away from there. That is a LONG time for God to respond to an innocent little kid. My prayers had fallen on deaf ears. Of course by then I'd been brainwashed that I was evil and deserved to be punished, so in high school I actually wanted to go through confirmation, wanted to volunteer in an anti-abortion clinic, wanted to teach little kids Sunday school. My self hatred deepening each moment as I sat on those wooden benches and heard over and over how bad I was. It was around my senior year of high school that I started to question. Of course, questions led to more questions, and I started to awaken from my self deprecating ways and realized that Lent is just another control and manipulation method that I refuse to play a part in. Instead I'm going to be grateful, love myself and spread flowery messages instead of bloody crosses.
For the next 40 days and for the rest of your life overflow with love!
I opened my FB this afternoon and saw this post from a friend in Colorado. Genius.
A while back I decided to give up suffering for Lent. You know how Catholics are into guilt and suffering, the we must feel pain to be connected to God thing.
I just don't agree. I'm not sure why millions of people do, actually. It feels awful.
My new relationship with this universal energy is all about being positive, kind, generous, grateful, forgiving, all the opposite things I was raised with in church. I remember being a little kid, like 6 or 7 and thinking to myself as the preist preaches, how can I be this bad? I'm just a little kid. Could I possibly just be a sinner, how come I am so bad? I wish someone had told me about giving up for lent back then. This was also around the time that I was being manipulated and victimized and I distinctly remember asking God for help. Please make this stop, please help me. It wasn't until I was 12 that we moved away from there. That is a LONG time for God to respond to an innocent little kid. My prayers had fallen on deaf ears. Of course by then I'd been brainwashed that I was evil and deserved to be punished, so in high school I actually wanted to go through confirmation, wanted to volunteer in an anti-abortion clinic, wanted to teach little kids Sunday school. My self hatred deepening each moment as I sat on those wooden benches and heard over and over how bad I was. It was around my senior year of high school that I started to question. Of course, questions led to more questions, and I started to awaken from my self deprecating ways and realized that Lent is just another control and manipulation method that I refuse to play a part in. Instead I'm going to be grateful, love myself and spread flowery messages instead of bloody crosses.
For the next 40 days and for the rest of your life overflow with love!
1 comment:
I haven't given anything up for Lent or New Years in years. I also agree that focusing on positive energy is healthier than being worried about rotting in hell. I got confirmed in college and now wonder why. I guess I liked the church we attended, but I didn't need to get confirmed?
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